Iwata & Friends take pay cuts in light of fiscal shortfall

“Am I pretty now, Mother?!”

With Wii U sales falling well short of expectations and affecting Nintendo’s bottom line [and in the meantime everything with a pulse giving its opinion on What Nintendo Should Do, as is nature’s way], company president Satoru “Kirby’s Uncle” Iwata today stated he would go sit in the corner and think about what he’s done. In addition, he announced that his salary will be reduced by 50% for the next five months, with other company board members also taking temporary pay cuts in the 20 to 30 percent range, in what amounts to a largely symbolic move because we all know Nintendo is DOOMED.

For his part, NOA’s Reggie will get to keep his Omaha Steak Club membership, but will skip breakfast on days with an ‘S’ in them. And, in a show of support from outside the company, former Capcom developer Shinji Mikami has once again cut off his own head, vowing in a video press release not to re-attach it until Nintendo posts a quarterly profit. That footage is reproduced below.