New Old Games: July 28

At long last, humanity (especially frat houses too small for ping-pong/excessively long dinner tables) can rest assured that the definitive virtual beer pong simulator has been released. Pong Toss: Frat Party Games (1 to 4 players for the low, low price of 800 points) is this week’s Wii Ware release, and while presenting an accurate depiction of “liquid” pong (there’s not a beer in sight!), unfortunately other traditional frat games like “beating the nerd” and “deep-seated aggression towards overbearing parents forcing you to attend your shitty state school because of their legacy discount” are missing. Hey JV Games, I know I’m just some staffer on a fansite, but if you made a sequel with some “hilarious” frat games, I might be a tad more interested. Oh yeah, and there was also a few VC games released this week, but at this point, who really cares? Click the jump to find out what was released and hopefully see me use a few more parenthetical statements.

Just to piss off people who can’t wait to pick up SNK Arcade Classics Volume One, Art of Fighting 2 (Neo Geo, 900 points) hits the service (ha!). Please, don’t rush out and purchase this game. We need to send a clear message that we want better, more affordable games on the service. Plus, just buy SNK Arcade Classics! Don’t be a rube, guy.

Also, I remember playing Chase H.Q. (TG16, 600 points) at my friend Lewis’ house when I lived in Alaska. How’s that for some biographical information? All I can remember about this game was waiting patiently for him to put Bong (EDIT: While I meant to write Bonk and am completely able to change it… in POST!, I thought this was inadvertently hilarious. Parentheses!) back in the damn system. He’s one of two people I ever met to have a TG16. While we’re reminiscing, remember the Sega Channel? That service was ahead of it’s time. But I digress.